Primal (and low-FODMAP) on a budget: Hash

Oh, you guys.

Back in March I had this infection, see. I will spare you the details but it wasn't anything too bad; however, I am allergic to all the stuff that doctors usually prescribe for this particular thing so I ended up on Cipro. I was scared half to death because heavy-duty antibiotics usually do a real number on my guts, but I am here to tell you, my guts have never been happier than during the 10 days I was taking that stuff. I've always had digestive issues, let's call them, and this stuff FIXED THEM. Just like that. Until I finished my prescription.

At first I was thinking, okay, well, it was the drugs. The drugs fixed me and now I'm broken again because I'm not taking them anymore. Then I was thinking, okay, well, I was not eating any dairy whatsoever while I was taking those drugs because you aren't supposed to, and I know I have trouble with dairy already, so I'll go off the dairy again! And IT FIXED ME. For a couple of weeks. And then I was broken again. I started taking probiotics and drinking kombucha and eating raw fermented sauerkraut and if anything the problem got WORSE. Um, what?!

This led to me frantically Googling things like "PALEO DID NOT FIX MY GUTS OMG WTF WHY IS THIS HAPPENING" which led me to FODMAPs and holy cow, about 80% of my diet at the time was made up of vast quantities of things on the Do Not Eat list (fructans and polyols especially). So yeah. Maybe there is something to this FODMAP thing? I dunno, but I am going to try cutting WAY back on those foods for a bit and see how I do.

And that is my roundabout way of tell you that hash is good, hash is cheap, hash is super customizable to whatever foods you happen to be eating and/or tolerating at any given moment. Hash is really just bits of stuff all cooked together, I mean really, it could not be easier to make.

For the version in that photo up there I just chopped up a couple of slices of bacon and cooked them in a skillet until crispy, then added cubed red-skinned potatoes (if you don't eat potatoes, just leave them out -- my reasoning is that they're a whole food and therefore not verboten in my version of primal/paleo but my blood sugar is fine and I'm not trying to lose weight so you do whatever), cubed zucchini and diced red bell peppers. Then I tossed in some shredded, cooked chicken and a handful of chopped fresh herbs, stuck a lid on the pan, turned the heat down to medium and let it cook, stirring frequently, until the veggies were tender. Season with salt and pepper and Bob's your uncle.

This makes a very filling, satisfying dish. You can throw in whatever meat and veggies you like (I would LOVE to have added onion but it's a FODMAP no-no) and you can get by with small quantities of more expensive ingredients (like decent quality meat) while bulking it out with cheap stuff (like in-season veggies). And you can make a crapload of it and eat it all week for lunch! Yeah!

So yeah. Hash is good. FODMAPs are delicious bad. Apparently. I'll let you know what happens.

Primal on a budget: week-long chickenpalooza

Homemade (easy!) chicken stock. Liquid gold, baby.

Here's what you do, right?

You buy a chicken. A whole chicken. Preferably a pastured, organic, humanely-raised whole chicken. You season it liberally with salt and pepper, maybe a little dried thyme or something, and you stick it in the slow cooker (along with the neck and whatever nasty bits were stuffed in the cavity)(don't bother adding any liquid) on Low before you go to bed for the night.

You wake up in the morning to the smell of roast chicken, which reminds you that you need to head to the kitchen first thing and take that sucker out of the slow cooker. While the coffee brews you shred every last bit of meat off of that thing, put a little in the fridge for later, and put the rest in the freezer for way later. You dump the bones and gristly bits back in the slow cooker, pour another cup of coffee, roughly chop an onion and a couple of stalks of celery and a few carrots into quarters. Don't bother to peel anything, just dump it all in the slow cooker with the bones. Maybe you crush a clove of garlic or two and toss that in as well. Along with a handful of fresh parsley. And some whole peppercorns. And maybe a bay leaf, if you've got one. If you want to leach as many minerals as possible out of those bones, you add a tablespoon or so of vinegar. Then you add a couple of quarts of water, put the lid back on, set the cooker to Low, and go about your day.

At least six hours later (longer is better) you put a cheesecloth-lined wire mesh strainer over a big bowl and dump in the contents of the slow cooker. You're left with the richest, most amazing chicken stock ever, which you ladle into containers for the fridge and freezer. And now you can pretty much eat for a week, for maybe 20 minutes worth of actual effort and the cost of one measly chicken.

***

When I tell people I eat primally, the first thing they ask is how my cholesterol numbers are (I actually haven't had them checked for about a year, but I promise to get back to you). The second thing they ask is, "Isn't it expensive? And time-consuming?"

It can be, but it doesn't HAVE to be. I mean sure, if I was eating grass-fed ribeyes three times a day and making complicated vegetable preparations to go with each one, I'd be out of time/patience AND money pretty quickly. But I'm telling you, buy ONE really good chicken per week, and do that up there, and you've got at least one meal per day for one person for an entire week sorted.

Use the broth as a base for all sorts of soups (primal ramen, maybe?) and sauces, drink a hot mug of it for breakfast, stir in a little sriracha if you've got a cold.

Put the shredded chicken in soups, lettuce wraps/tacos, salads, omelettes, or just snack on it right from the fridge when you need a quick hit of protein.

You can be lazy and cheap frugal and still be primal, y'all. I'm living proof!